What the Hell Page 11

  My sword lodged in the ground and I stared in disbelief.

  Ulric smiled as he saw my blade buried up to the hilt in the street, and I let it wink out of existence with the nail still in my hand. Stepping forward, I focused on Mjolnir flying into my left hand and sent a bolt of electricity flying toward him. In my right hand, the gladius reformed and I stepped forward with my other foot and willed a jet of heavenfire to follow right up the ass of my previous attack.

  As anticipated, Ulric deflected my elemental strike just as the heavenflame smashed into his chest and sent him flying back as if launched from a trebuchet, a flaming mortar illuminating the night like the meteor I had seen a few minutes ago.

  I blurred forward with my blade angled just behind me in hot pursuit. (Ha, hot, get it? ’Cause . . . ’cause he was on fire. Anyway . . .)

  As I approached the flaming Ulric, I brought up Mjolnir and willed another lightning attack to rain down from above, striking him right at the moment of impact into a commercial trailer that wasn’t attached to a truck. For the briefest of moments, I became annoyed that someone would just leave an entire container parked on the street. Then it exploded as Ulric violated its metal walls, and the lightning danced across the metal container in blue arcs coated in heavenfire.

  I skidded to a halt as the electrified flames reached out in all directions for something else to eat.

  “Fucking NEAT!” I cried out in victory at the realization that I could combine my spells, just as a feeling of dread tickled the base of my skull.

  Going on nothing but instinct alone, I leaped forward a few feet while pivoting in midair to see the Spear of Destiny arc inches in front of my face.

  As I landed, I did a backward roll and came to my feet in a defensive crouch as I faced . . . nothing.

  My eyes darted all around, finding the street was empty.

  My shadow, which had been cast by the moonlight, began to grow more prominent before lengthening. After a moment, it began shrinking, and horror dawned on me as I remembered this same scenario when Locke had thrown a Death Star at Depweg and me.

  I shot my face toward the sky and had my suspicions confirmed as a ball of fire rocketed toward me. The instinct to run was nearly overwhelming until I thought about the devastation Locke’s attack had caused. Valenta’s, the church, and even the cemetery I called home would be decimated in an instant. Crap! Hadn’t I just been in this situation with Silver? Ulric was willing to bet I’d sacrifice myself again to save the innocents of the city.

  With a curse and fierce scowl, I lifted Mjolnir toward the descending fireball and grabbed control of the elemental magic therein. Though the ball was a perfect balance of Hell and elemental magics, I had an idea that needed to work.

  Bringing my gladius tip to touch my magic-focusing hammer, I flooded the ball with a fresh stream of heavenfire. I didn’t know if it would be effective, but the idea was to fill the attack with enough of the resources I could control and shoot the ball right back at Ulric. For all I knew, I could just be guaranteeing the attack would blow up more of Houston when it struck.

  Focusing with Mjolnir, I was able to stop the descent of the sphere and even begin reversing it like a hot air balloon being flooded with fresh fuel to provide lift.

  I wish I could have seen Ulric’s face, which was hidden by a fireball that was now the size of an entire city block.

  As if he had heard my request, black smoke coalesced in front of me. Ulric’s scowl was evident even before color returned to his features.

  I felt completely helpless all of a sudden, as I was now in control of something that could potentially kill hundreds of thousands.

  “Clever trick,” Ulric purred as he brought the tip of the spear to my neck. I stood, completely frozen and helpless to my maker’s will.

  “Don’t,” I whispered through my strain. An idea came to me.

  “Lay down your arms and let us have a . . . how does the expression go . . . chitchat? Mmm, yes, that is it.”

  “I-I can’t, and you know it. Countless will die if I let go.”

  “Do you not remember the lesson on pouring too much of your energy into an attack?” Ulric countered with a shark’s grin.

  “Always the nurturing teacher,” I said facetiously.

  “Drop the ball, John,” he commanded as the spear pushed in hard enough to dent my skin.

  “Fine,” I said as I first lowered and then dropped the hammer. It clattered at Ulric’s feet, causing him to smile.

  “And the sword.”

  I willed the manifestation to disappear, but kept my fist over as much of the nail as I could.

  The ball began to drop, and I focused on pulling all the energy from the attack into my hammer. Though it was on the ground, it was by my choosing, and thusly, still in my control.

  “Now then, where were we?” Ulric purred as he pulled the spear away from my neck just as the first of the heavenfire tendrils reached from the base of the sphere and toward Mjolnir. Too bad for Ulric, his head was directly in the path. Wonder if that was on purpose? Spoiler alert: it was.

  A shriek of surprise ripped from Ulric’s gaping mouth as flames enveloped his exposed head.

  “Hey, Ulric, what was the lesson on vampires and fire?” I taunted in direct reference to our first battle as rivals in London which had involved hungry fire. As his scream crescendoed from surprise to agony, I ripped the spear from his failing grip and jumped backward. At the last second, I remembered the defensive spell on the staff from when I had grabbed it from Silver. Preparing for the attack, I gritted my teeth as I waited, but nothing happened. Maybe Ulric hadn’t reset the spell for the staff’s new master? Thoughts for later, focus for now.

  Ulric began running around as melting hands beat against a flaming skull.

  “Oh, shit!” I yelled as I realized all too late what the consequences of my actions might be.

  I extended my hand, and Mjolnir flew into it. Only about a third of the sphere had been sucked into my hammer, and I didn’t have time to let the rest pull into me. This was not only due to the fact that I had previously learned my lesson on trying to absorb vast power into my well without my celestial armor, but I also didn’t think Ulric could survive more than a few seconds covered in heavenflame and hellfire. Lilith, I don’t think any creature in the known universe could, including Archangels.

  Without a choice, I brought Mjolnir up and then cracked it toward the ground, sending the tendril in a wave up toward the sphere.

  “God, if you’re listening, could use some help,” I quietly prayed as the whip hit the sphere and exploded in the air.

  I didn’t have time to watch the magnificence of the detonation, but I was keenly aware of the entire block lighting up as if the sun had decided to move ninety-two million miles closer to Houston.

  I had to squint as I focused on pulling the quickly evaporating water from the air. I was too late, as the heat from the explosion was evaporating the normally dense humidity all around. Seeing a red hydrant on the street, I threw Mjolnir to smash into the metal, sending a geyser up toward the sky. Mentally yanking the hammer back to my hand, I sent a torrent of water rushing toward Ulric. It smashed into him and sent him tumbling down the street, extinguishing the flames in a hiss of white vapor.

  Fire began raining from above, and I was horrified to see it was an amalgamation of regular, heaven, and hellfire.

  Without a moment to spare, I lifted my hammer to the sky and asked the clouds to condense overhead while simultaneously sending the pressurized flow from the hydrant upward to rain back down. Within a minute or two — which in terms of celestial fire eating away at buildings, is a long damn time — the stars were blotted out by gray-black clouds bloated with water from the nearby gulf.

  Letting go of Mjolnir, I shifted the spear to my left hand and brought up the nine-inch nail. My gladius sprang to life and I took in a huge breath as I lifted the point to the middle of the cloud cover.

  I willed a stream of heavenfire toward t
he sky, and became immediately concerned when it only reached twenty or thirty feet into the air.

  “What the . . . ?” I asked as I brought the sword down to inspect it, as if in doing so I might uncover a hidden red button that would provide all the juice I needed. I noticed I was somewhat light-headed.

  From the corner of my vision, I saw Ulric rolling over on the street and struggling to lift himself into a seated position.

  “Shit, shit, shit,” I barked between my teeth. “I don’t have time for this!” The rage was growing in my chest, fueled by the feeling of helplessness. I hated the feeling of not being able to do anything. I was not a Lilith-damned victim!!!

  My sword glowed brighter the angrier I got.

  Ulric pushed himself onto his knees and gingerly touched his blackened skull with charred fingers. He reached inside his robes and brought out a cluster of purple stones that I recognized.

  “NO!” I screamed, knowing what he was about to do. I only had precious seconds before he was strong enough to attack again. On top of that, I was steadily becoming weaker by the second. The thought of me pouring my emotions into a pillar of fire just minutes ago slapped me in the face, reminding me that the energy had to come from somewhere.

  “I’m scared,” I heard Dawson say, causing a vicious black tendril of hate to lash out from the dark corner of my mind.

  “No, no, no, NOOOOOO!” I bellowed as my sword ignited and a stream of raging fire shot into the sky, slamming into the cloud cover.

  Within a few seconds, a warm drop landed on my cheek, followed closely by another. Then it was pouring rain in thick sheets, the sound reminding me of the din at the River Styx.

  I dropped to my butt, exhausted all of a sudden, and placed my arms on my knees as I struggled to lift my head. Looking inward, I understood that, without the celestial armor, I was using my own well of power to fuel the sword. On top of this, I’d already been mentally exhausted before Ulric had showed up, the dick.

  Ulric slammed the stone into his chest, and energy poured into his being. Fresh skin bloomed like weeds in an unmaintained lawn, covering every square inch of his blackened skull.

  Breathing heavily, I surveyed around me and saw the flames were being extinguished from the heavy rain.

  I let my gladius wink out, unable to maintain the fire any longer, and grabbed the spear off the ground. Using it as a prop, I lifted myself to a standing position and waited for Ulric.

  He was on his feet as well and looking at me with hate-filled eyes as the last of his skin recovered. Water was cascading off his chin and hands.

  “You are a fool, child, unable to control your emotions to the point where you risk all of eternity. He was right about you. You would never listen to reason.”

  I barked out a weak laughter, which made Ulric shoot daggers with his crimson eyes that danced with the purple and green of a warlock.

  Out of breath, I countered with, “Whatever you or that ass-lord says, I know I can do the exact opposite and be in the right.” I hefted the staff from hand to hand. “But at least I have a new toy,” I said with a winning smile.

  “Do you, now?” Ulric said, hefting the obsidian staff with the Spear of Destiny at the tip.

  “The fu . . .” I mouthed in disbelief as I looked at my empty hands. “Bastard!” I cried out as I willed my gladius to life. It took everything in me not to collapse to my knees.

  “Tsk, tsk, tsk. You were never one to conserve energy, child. It’s always all or nothing with you. Maybe if you had your armor to provide celestial strength.”

  I let the gladius go as I realized I was running on fumes, barely able to stand any longer. My mouth was dry as I licked at lips that felt chapped, even with the rain pouring down my face. I was starving, my well completely empty.

  Crap, I thought to myself.

  Free . . . me . . . a voice whispered back.

  “As a matter of fact, I think I’ll be taking that weapon,” Ulric announced as he blurred forward. There wasn’t even a feeling of impact as the hand holding the nail fell to the ground. Ulric leaned down and caught it before it could touch the road.

  My nerves, which had apparently been on a lunch break, realized something was wrong and sprang to life, sounding the alarm. A lance of pain shot up my arm, stealing my breath as I collapsed to my knees and my head bobbed loosely on my shoulders.

  “Now I have a shiny new toy,” Ulric declared slowly and purposefully as he pried my fingers apart and pulled out the nail. He let my hand drop to the ground with a wet thud as it splashed in the lake that was once a road. Ulric rolled the long nail around in his palm, feeling its weight. I could only stare through eyes that wanted to slam shut as I witnessed my defeat.

  I blinked through the warm rain as I struggled to look up at the monster in front of me. It smelled pleasant. I had always liked the aroma of rain in the air. It was . . . clean.

  “You see, John? All I had to do to disarm you was make a careful strike. I did not risk all of eternity like you did with me, foolish child. Wait,” Ulric said with eyes that widened sarcastically as he looked around, “we have been here before, have we not?” He made a show of looking around. “No oil lamp on the wall this time, is there, boy?” His eyes leveled on me and a coldness filled my veins as his expression turned to stone. Ulric had learned his lesson and was not about to repeat his mistake.

  Ulric hefted the nail and a dark gladius grew, like watching a Popsicle melting in reverse. As the blade lengthened, hellfire started up the obsidian sword, and understanding at the implications of my error began to dawn on me.

  “Ulric . . . d-don’t . . .” I said between heaving breaths. It was all I could do not to pass out.

  “I already told you that Samael has decreed that I am not to kill you. Yet.” He emphasized the last word after a poignant pause. “That being said, he did not specifically say that I could not teach you a lesson.”

  “Fuck . . . fuck you . . . and your fucking lessons,” I spat, on the verge of blacking out. A scarlet pool was mixing with the rainwater under the stump of my wrist. I was oozing blood that I couldn’t afford to lose. I could feel my sunken cheeks sticking to my teeth as my face became gaunt. My eyeballs hurt for some reason.

  A shark’s grin formed on Ulric’s dripping face, and in my delirium, I could almost swear it went from ear to ear like a caricature.

  I saw the tendrils of dawn reaching up from behind the buildings, prompting a stem of hope to sprout that maybe we would be incinerated at the same time, effectively canceling the prophecy.

  He grabbed me, and the world around us began rising.

  With a head that felt like it weighed as much as a car, I let my chin rest on my chest and saw that the world wasn’t getting taller; we were lowering into a green-and-purple portal. Water boiled away in an instant were hellfire touched.

  My exhaustion won the battle with my conscious mind and sleep claimed me, like a monster under the bed reaching for a leg lazily left dangling over the side.

  Chapter 10

  The day swallowed the night, and I dove deeper into unconsciousness, drifting in a familiar dreamless slumber. There was a brief reprieve, as I was vaguely aware that Ulric couldn’t kill me if we were both asleep.

  After the night blotted out the light of day, I awoke inside of a plexiglass prison. I instinctively recognized how similar my clear cage was to the one we had used to contain Dawson’s corpse when it was being controlled by Lolth.

  “Oh, Lilith,” I breathed out as understanding started to construct a clear picture in my mind. Looking down, I saw that I was naked and in a pool of my own blood. My hand was still missing and had not healed. I lifted the nub and grabbed at the wrist in an attempt to stop the flow of oozing blood. A quick check on my well of power showed it was dangerously empty. There was perhaps the faintest sheen of energy left that was shallow enough that I didn’t think I could drown an ant beneath its surface.

  I was freezing from blood loss. Paper-thin skin stretched over deflated mus
cles. My tongue felt alien in my mouth, like a dry sponge. It hurt to move, like my tendons had been replaced with beef jerky. Using the barricade as leverage, I managed to push myself into a standing position and began feeling the walls.

  As I looked around, trembling as much from loss of blood as from terror, I saw Ulric in the darkness. He was just an outline in the dark, but I knew it was him. My eyes refused my command to go predatory, unable to siphon any energy from my empty well.

  Ulric stepped into the light and I nearly fainted from shock and dismay at what he was holding. It was a small girl, no more than four or five, sound asleep in his arms. The face of the child was peaceful and serene under her brown curls. I knew in an instant that the mortal was under Ulric’s command to stay unconscious.

  “No,” I mouthed, unable to get the words out.

  “Oh, yes,” Ulric declared eerily as he stepped to the prison cell and unlocked it. “I told you I would corrupt your soul, and I am a man of my word.” He pulled the clear door open and stepped inside. I backed to the furthest corner and slid down the plastic wall with a series of squeaks as my skin tried to stick to the material. My ass touched the cold plexiglass of the floor, and my lip quivered as I saw the rosy cheeks of the child as she stirred. Lilith, I was so hungry.

  In my mind, I felt something clatter, but couldn’t pull my eyes away from the child to look inside the control room of my mind.

  “Please,” I mouthed, still too weak to formulate words, my tongue just getting in the way rather than articulating the syllables.

  “Hmm? What was that?” Ulric asked as he tilted one ear closer to me. “Did you say ‘please’? As in, please let me eat this innocent child so I do not go insane from the thirst? Well, if you insist,” he chuckled to himself. As he finished, he crouched down and gently set the girl between us. “But first, I think I am forgetting something, hmm?” he said as he got to his feet and put one hand on his hip as the other stroked his chin. He made a show of looking around, pretending to try remembering what was missing. I remembered what he had said in my lair, in front of the Archangel Gabriel.